A way with words...

I arrived back home on Saturday 21st August, twelve hours after setting off from South Africa, leaving behind a lot of memories, 4 beautiful friends and an amazing country. My time away has grown me in ways that I am both discovering now and have yet to discover, but I know that there has been a change in my soul. Not only because I lost a best friend, but also because my heart was broken. My heart was broken for the poor, for the disadvantaged, the kids that used to knock on our door, the abused women at the clinic, the HIV positive children at pre-school. My faith was challenged, and I learnt how to put love into action. I had some amazing times, I learnt so much and I made friendships for life. I also learnt how to grieve. I have to come back to this grief, because for me, this is what fills most waking hours at this time.

Grieving is something that no-one can prepare you for. No-one sits you down when you’re young and explains the process, tells you what you will feel. Because the truth is no-one knows how you’ll react, and grief is individual. 8 weeks after Annie died I’m still trying to figure it out, blindly finding my way down the path. So I cry a lot, I talk a lot and then I get on with life, like she would have wanted me too. But what I have found is that Hillsong music has helped me lately- in the moments that I choose and need to set aside to be Annie times, their worship is always there, and the lyrics and music resonate within me and help me remember her under God’s light. It connects me to my source of hope, helps me express myself and remember her. In SA I would often plug myself into my IPod, sit with my journal and that was my signal that this was reflection time, Annie time. Here in the UK I have my own space, but I still come back to the music.

“For there is no-one who can love me like you do, and forever I’m running back to you”.
The Father’s Heart, A Beautiful Exchange

So thank-you for everyone who supported me-in a all ways - this really has been a life changing year.